Good news

I should not be updating my blog,  I should be sleeping but since I'm up nursing Micah and have yet to go to sleep anyway I'll just update you all on our situation.
We checked out of the house today at 3:30ish. I had all but a few things loaded in the truck and ready to go when the man showed up and he agreed to put the trash out later this week since the service just went yesterday.  Once I got on the road and I mean like just turned out of the neighborhood, I got a phone call.  Parent's magazine is starting a new partnership program with doula's. .. They want me to represent Indianapolis.  I can't help but laugh that she called at that moment exactly.  I told her about our move and asked for her contact information in case once we are settled I could look into it.
After hanging up with her I pulled into the gas station to fuel up and as I was getting out my wallet Patrick called.  He passed the test!  Thank you God!  What a relief! I want to do a little dance just thinking about it!  At that moment I just tried my hardest not to cry.  Then I called parents magazine back up and told her we were moving to Philadelphia. ...I can't believe I'm saying that. . I know where we are going to live!  She says the city isn't represented yet and I can have the spot if I want it.  The cost how ever is not manageable so she lowered the price for me. .. But I am far from knowing if I will stay in PA a full year. .. so I'm sitting on it. . Probably will turn it down at this time but I'm super honored that they chose me out of all the women they could have chosen. And then my day got crazy.  As if cleaning the house watching 3 kids and packing the truck alone wasn't hard enough.  I hit horrible traffic, which caused me to use the clutch a lot and apparently I was doing a poor job of it because something started stinking up under the hood like a burnt belt.  And then Caeden started crying because he had to pee so bad. I hate when you are stuck in traffic with no options.  I pulled over let caeden pee, and checked under the hood. .. everything seemed Ok.  We got going again. .. At 5mph.
My exit was clogged,  I took the next one thinking maybe we could get food and get back on later.  There were no restaurants right of that exit so I gps'd my way toward Michigan off the expressway until I found one.  Wendy's. 
Fia spilled grape juice in her car seat while we were at the gas station so I had to clean her up and caeden had to pee again. We got food, and I got everyone situated and loaded and took off. .. Caeden wad suppsed to buckle himself but forgot until we were on the road with no shoulder to pull off on, to tell me he didn't do it so I had to find a parking lot really quick and pull over again. I left the gas station at 5:20pm and was finally really out of Indianapolis at 7:10pm... I was stressed to say the least.
But we made it to Michigan.  Patrick has a job! We have a plan! And now at 12am I'm going to sleep in my new house, my home on wheels.

God is so good to me.

I'm exhausted, off and on all day I have felt tears coming on but I managed to make it through the day without spilling any. I promise nothing about tomorrow.  I never could have made it through today if not for Brenna and Kyle.
Kyle came over after he got out of work, didn't even get a chance to relax just went straight to work helping me load the trailer which in the end he pretty much did all by himself.  And then just over half way done Brenna came over and entertained the kids and carried Micah around and helped me bag up some last lingering items. 
Kyle stuffed the trailer so well that all I have to do tomorrow is putt a couple twin sized mattresses in the back of the truck and tie them down.  Easy peasy. But I never never never could have done it without his help. He was out there saving space by filling dresser drawers and Patrick's tool box with loose items to make more space!
Caeden was going crazy (its how he deals with stress,  bouncing of walls), Fia was super emotional,  Micah was sleepy,  they were just insane,  all of them, but then Brenna showed up like an angel she just took over with the kids and I was able to breathe a little better.
After they left I took the kids to get dinner at Bob Evans and got one of their meals free because it is Tuesday evening.  And then came back home and prepared some beds out of blankets on the floor,  I'm sure to wake up stiff in the morning but it is only one night.
Inspection at 3 or 3:30pm tomorrow.  Patrick will be testing all day at his potential new job.  We both have a lot on our plates tomorrow.. my prayers are due to be non stop all day and night.

Thank you plus part two

Yesterday I thanked a lot of people but didn't quite get them all.  Today I hope to reach the rest of them.
Scott- Thank you for being such a gracious pastor and offering us the use of the tables for our sale. And for always being a friendly face and welcoming us each week and talking with us.
Clayton- Thank you for introducing me to your wife and for being so friendly that day at the pizza with the pastors event.
Angie- Thank you for being there to tell me that money should never be the reason I don't join in something. . You were absolutely right and I am so glad I went!
Vicky- Thank you for dinner last Sunday!  It was very good!  We enjoyed it,  and my kids had never had ambrosia before so it was a treat for them.
Katelynn- Thank you for paying for me to attend the painting and then when it didn't happen giving me the money as a gift. .. What an absolutely wonderful gift!  You are such a blessing! I wish we had gotten to know each other better I think we have a lot in common.
Amy- Your smile so tender and voice so soft is a welcome relief in a world of harsh women. .. Thank you for being you and reminding me to be a lady by seeing you be yourself.
Michelle- Your son is probably the only kid Caeden called a friend here. .. What a gift for him in a time when his life keeps changing so quickly and completely.  Thank you for that. .I know that may seem like a funny thing to thank you for but if not for you there would be no him and that just won't do.  Also I think of you and all you are going through and I think surly God is doing some incredible things in your heart.  I don't know if I could look at things in quite the same way.  You have such a positive attitude and I love it, but your still real which makes you wonderful.
Kritine- what a blessing you are,  so real and transparent and open about how God is taking and molding you and making you into the woman you are becoming and so willing to let him change you.  You're a great example to us all.
Kile- Your friendship with my husband has been wonderful.  What man does not need that in his life?  Thank you for everything you've done for us,  and for everything your wife is asking you now to do for us. .. No pressure though.  We are both really going to miss you and Brenna and the friendship we were building.

Again if I missed anyone it wasn't on purpose.  We love you all!

Thank you plus

There are people in Indianapolis who need recognition and I've been trying to think of a way to recognize them all that would make the job easy but still include all of them,  so my blog is going to serve as a thank you home for the day.
First I want to say thank you to chick fil a... Yeah that sounds corny but I came here with no friends and lived at first in a hotel room with no space to let the kids play. This restaurant picked up a special need for me.  They helped me make my first friend here in Indianapolis.  They also allowed me to pass out books on world book night to their customers which was awesome too!  So thank you chick fil a!
Next I want to recognize Lawana, I met her at chick fil a and she was so sweet helping me to Orient myself in the city and pointing me in the direction of good home school resources.  I only wish we had gotten together more. ..I am sorry I never did have you over for dinner like I was hoping Lawana! Keep being awesome lady!
Next another organization but within that, many many people.  Life church Indy.  Amazing church!  Amazing people!  I can't even begin to explain the blessings they have been to us!  The first time we went to church the staff let us use a computer to help us get the rental house we are now moving out of.  Then the church rallied together to help us move into the house,  the pastor and his wife (Tony and Laurie) even came and unloaded the trailer with our things into the house and got us a nice card to welcome us!
More about Tony and Laurie; they continued each week to say hello and find out how we were,  they prayed with us,  they treated us immediately like part of their family. When I ran across them on the way to see a movie they chatted with me like they had known me for years.  I will always consider them the best most welcoming family of God we have been lucky enough to be part of.
Inside of Life Church Indy there are small groups called life groups.  I only really had time to join one but ended up in 3. The first one was a Monday morning women's group focused on being the woman God created me to be,  something that has always been on my heart to continue daily to learn.  I'm sad that though the group isn't over tomorrow will be the last time I see many of these women.
Jaclyn- Your Heart is beautiful, thank you for welcoming me even though I didn't actually sign up!  And for being there for me in prayer and helping to organize help for my family while we prepare for this new part of our lives.
Amanda- Thank you for inviting me to join. I probably wouldn't have known how wonderful you all are with out that invitation!  And you're absolutely blessed with those three beautiful girls!
Brenna- I was so happy to see your face among the women in the group since you were one of few I had already met. And your friendship and kindness has been incredible.  I'm so thankful for all the things you've done for us including but not limited to babysitting our kids so we could have a date on our anniversary and buying us pizza the night Patrick was laid off.
Debbie-You are a kind hearted woman with a passion for service.  Your willingness to help us and the actual help you gave are laid on my heart as an example to follow. 
Lindsay- who could be with kids all day running around serving the way you do with such warmth and friendliness the way you do?  I appreciate you on so many levels I can not even begin to know how to tell you what your welcome alone did for us on Sunday mornings, but you are so much more than that!  I am praying for you. ..I love you! Rebecca and Carly- Thank you for being my accountability partners and keeping me motivated to do good and stay in the word and treat my husband with the kindness I should.  You both are treasures!  And your families are blessed to have you.
It is with great difficulty that I stop listing names among my Monday group. . But thank you to all of you!  I am blessed, so blessed by you all! And my prayers will include you all even if my blog does not. ..I love you and you know the wonderful gifts you have made toward my family and I love that about you! Tuesday mornings I attempted to attend another group.  I didn't go every week so it was difficult to really get to know every one but Kylin our leader had a heart of worship and lead us with a gentleness not many women possess any more.  Thank you Kylin!
Mandy came to my house during our garage sale this weekend simply to help me in whatever capacity I needed,  she showed up just in time to help me get my children fed lunch and with out her I don't know how I would have managed!  Thank you Mandy! And I'm sorry about not being sure I would know who you were. ..if it helps at all I had it figured out by the time you arrived. .lol.
Britney- Thank you for being the first friendly face for our family at church that first Sunday.  You set the tone for our whole experience!
Rose and Marcella-my children love you,  and your care of them was amazing.  I do appreciate the time each week that I am allowed to spend connecting with other women to be the mom I need to be for these previous gifts God has given me, and you provided that time!  Thank you!
Friday nights was the only time available that Patrick could attend a life group so we also joined one then.
Tana and Dave-thank you for being leaders with love, and for letting us into a part of your lives where you Dave were front and center in a miracle!  God is so incredibly good! I hope many more are coming your way! Your children and their care for the rest of the children in the group was amazing, as well as Millie's special love of Micah.
Outside of the groups but still in the church Thank You to Starla for taking us to the museum and always being a friendly face every time I saw you.  I only wish we had gotten a chance to get to know each other better.  Thank You to the men who helped us unload the things we didn't sell at the garage sale into the church pantry, I was so exhausted and your help made the job so much lighter!
So many other people need to be thanked I can't possibly fit them all in this blog. .. But know that my heart is always with you and your church will go down in my book as the best church I have had the pleasure of being a part of!
Thank you Indianapolis for being so wonderful to us, it has been great to be here and I hope the next stop for us will be just as rewarding!

Garage sale success! Yay God!

You may recall yesterday I was concerned about the rain making our garage sale not go well... I am very happy to announce that it went better than we could have even hoped! God pulled through in such amazing ways! Yesterday the rain quit at 11 am as predicted and the people started showing up in bigger numbers. We made almost $200 and I was happy about the items that sold. We were not able to pull out the beds or couches because the garage was so full and the rain lasted so long but we still sold a lot of the smaller things and almost all of them for the asking price. Today we managed to get the rest of our items out to the garage and driveway and display them. Things were selling so quick I was having a hard time keeping up with what people got and how much it cost but still managed and some customers were so helpful by translating English to Spanish for me since I never learned Spanish and we had a lot of Spanish speaking customers. Again many of our items were sold at the price I had asked, some for less but not less than I had wanted... No one bested me with their haggling, I rocked my own garage sale. I'm usually so bad at getting what I want for things but I often felt God prompting me to just say a price and sound confident so I did and people just went with it. We were getting worried that the big items wouldn't sell, like the couches and the dryer and some shelves Patrick made... But they all did. Then I said we would pack up and quit as soon as the kid's book shelves sold but it looked like they were not going to so we started putting things inside and a couple stopped and bought not only the two book shelves but also a Nicknack shelf my mom made me years ago. That marked the last thing of any real value that we really wanted to sell. It was amazing! The only thing that didn't sell was a table the kids use a lot that I really love anyway so it was OK it didn't sell. I may even try to find a way to bring it with us on our travels if it is possible. I'm so thrilled that all the little things still left are small and will fit in some boxes and be donated to the church in one trip. So begins the adventure of a life time!

selling it all

Let me just start by saying that I am writing this on my phone and am known for bad spelling when using it so please forgive me for any errors while reading this. Today is our first day of the garage sale. The weather called for light rain this morning. ...ha! I woke up at 5 am to a mild downpour. But I'm not worried about it. In my opinion God is much bigger than the weather and he knows I am doing this out of obedience to his call on our lives, so let it rain. I feel joy... I know that can be hard to believe. I'm incredibly stressed but I have joy and no one can take it away from me. Over Easter I screamed at my sister over the table, even swore at her, something I make a point never to say to anyone, and I said it to my sister, I feel like a real butt, however I realized my joy had been stolen, not by her, but by life. It isn't fair to take that out on another person, and it isn't right to let anything, anyone, or any situation steal what you alone can hold onto, Your joy. So I'm turning a new leaf. Despite all that I feel had been torn away from me I will have joy. And hopefully I will also have some customers, otherwise the church will be severely blessed by the amount of stuff I bring them on Monday. Life, God, Satan, bring what you may, I chose joy.

The best moment

The best moment?  When your six month old son who makes a lot of noise but not really babbling sounds clearly says mama while looking directly at you.
I had been trying to get him to have baby babbling conversations with me earlier in the day but he just wouldn't do it. .. And then while he was playing and I was doing some work to prepare the house he looked over at me and just said "mama" which is what my older kids call me so it wasn't as if he hasn't ever heard it before.
Caeden's first word was "hi" probably because I would greet him with "Hi baby" every time I came to where he was.  Fia's first word was "bottle" or the way she said it "bobble" since I had wanted to breast feed her and couldn't get it right it was both exciting and heart breaking for that to be her first word,  interestingly enough she said it very clearly while looking right at it and reaching for it,  but to my knowledge never said it again.
People always say the first word is usually mama or dada but until now that hasn't been the case for us. Thank you Micah!

Change and more and more and more change

We are embarking on the journey of a life time!
First off Micah was born in October, and his birth was amazing, go here for the full story.  But Patrick had taken a job in Oklahoma and it was pure joy to me that he was able to be at our sons birth.
A few days later however Patrick was laid off... big learning experience ladies and gentlemen!  Don't take a job without first asking if it is a long term position. 
So the kids and I were planning to move to my parents house until after Thanksgiving so that 1. my new born wouldn't be quite so newborn when traveling across the country, and 2. we could savor one last holiday with my family before leaving... well since plans changed we ended up staying until after Christmas instead praying for a new place to gain employment and find our lives back on track.
The holidays were great and Patrick found work in Indianapolis!  I joined him with the kids a few days after he left, and we stayed in a hotel for a few weeks.  Open your eyes to a whole new world!  There are tons of people living in hotels! Who knew? Not me, I mean I knew a few people who were homeless and got a room when ever they could afford it, but not that they actually LIVED in a HOTEL FULL TIME, it was interesting to learn about.
We were cramped and had been at this new company long enough that we felt it might be safe, and Patrick and I started looking for a place to rent. 
We found one, in Avon, and it was nicely placed just down the road from the church we started attending. It was a little small but I set straight to work unpacking and trying to form some resemblance of home. 
Then Patrick was laid off again.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME? yup he was now unemployed and so far from a long enough employment that we couldn't even fight unemployment to get the compensation to help us out.  Good thing Patrick is a saver, cause we'd be up a creek so to speak if it were not for him!
So what are we doing now?  Well I'm glad you asked.
We bought a 5th wheel and we are going through everything we own downsizing and selling and packing and storing.... We are literally selling as much as we can let go of.  I however refuse to get rid of the bed Patrick bought for me when we got married (who cares about the mattress I'm talking the frame), the bed all our children were conceived in, and the bed Micah was born in... yes born at home in our bed... this bed means a lot to me... so we are storing it in a storage unit along with a few things that each family member is to attached to let go of.  The rest is being assessed for usability and either going into the 5th wheel or being sold at our garage sale the last weekend of this month.
It is emotional, it is stressful, it is fun, it is crazy!
But we are doing it!
Patrick reports to a practical exam in PA on Wednesday, if he passes then we all move to PA to make a living in a 5th wheel full time, if not, then we park in the lot at mom and dad's house, this time not sharing dishes, only a bathroom with the rest of the family.  I'm excited, either way this goes I get to have my home, no packing involved, no matter where we live.
If we move to PA I plan to make some grand homeschooling memories by visiting places like the Brandywine Creek War memorial (don't quote me on that name, I just know it is Brandywine creek), and though it is of less historical value, we will visit Hershey PA... YUM!
This weekend we travel to MI, I am attending my Sister-in-law's (Welcome to the family Hannah!) baby shower, hosting Easter at mom and dad's house and packing all that we don't need RIGHT AWAY into the 5th wheel.
At church today (this church is amazing, if you are ever in Indianapolis or Avon Indiana you simply must visit it, the church welcomes you like family RIGHT AWAY!) a few people asked me how I was doing, a typical question that you come across from every direction no matter where you are, but here... they mean it... however my only answer is "I don't know!"  I can say this with a smile on my face, but seriously folks I have no idea how I'm doing.  I cry, I laugh, I pack, I move things, I take care of kids, I cook, but I really don't have much time right now to relax.. if I could maybe I'd have time to assess my thoughts and emotions, but I don't have that kind of time right now.