Mommy and Me

Mommy and Me
Sharing life with you is fullfilling

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

In a funk.

My husbands father passed away the beginning of the month, since he didn't know the man much at all you would think it would have little effect on us, but you would be wrong.  His father came from a family with a rich history,  financially and otherwise, but he was never given a chance to be part of their family, not really.  And his father in his last years of life due to health problems or other reasons didn't claim to have children, Patrick was his only son. The sense of belonging has been hard to navigate and is a subject that we don't see completely eye to eye on. We both agree that it is best for him to go see the family he never got to be a part of now.  And he has planned the trip. We can't all go so he is going alone.
I am not sure why but I am handling this trip badly. I believe it isn't just this trip but the uncertainty regarding it, and shortly after it I will be going on a trip myself, and that trip isn't completely scheduled either. I know I could leave in either Oct or Nov.  I don't much care for uncertainty.  It puts me in a mood.
Patrick has been getting the worst of it, which is to say he is noticing it when others are not.  I am trying not to be melancholy but that is what is happening.   God grants me the strength daily that I need for that day... but I can't help thinking about tomorrow. 
Another day has arrived. .. though it is pretty cold and my blankets are warm I must make the most of it.  Besides I'm pretty uncomfortable with Micah's attempts to crawl over my face, put his fingers up my nose and in my eyes and mouth.  His knees and elbows constantly land on my neck too.  So up I get. The children need mama to make breakfast!

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